Everyone has the right to access healthy and respectful romantic relationships, and relationships between trans women and men might be more common than you think. Many couples are in long-term relationships, are married, or have started families and are supported by their relatives and communities. Our relationships are more than romantic or sexual connections - they are an important connection to family, friends, and our broader community.
“I recently got married to my partner. I feel so happy! He makes me feel so beautiful. He’s a very kind and understanding man. I couldn’t legally get married in Malaysia but I can here in Australia. As a transgender woman, it was important to me to get married to feel secure and stronger in our relationship. On our wedding day, all our friends and family came along. We celebrated with a full heart.” – Sanu, trans woman
“Ideally, I would like to have a partner in my life, though it doesn’t necessarily have to be marriage. I want that person to embrace me for who I am. We all have the right to be safe and respected.” – Katrina, trans woman
Unfortunately, some people have negative views about trans women and their partners. This means these relationships aren’t always as visible or celebrated as other relationships. For example, you may not have seen many happy relationships between men and trans women shown on television, in films, or within your community, family, and friendship groups.
“I don’t think my family would be accepting if my girlfriend was trans.” – David
As a result, many men feel ashamed, isolated, unsafe, or nervous about their relationships and desires. Sometimes this can lead to men being secretive about their relationships with trans women.
“I was anxious, worried about people knowing—and not once did I ever think I was going to tell anyone.” – Mark
The support of family and friends is important for any relationship. Some men may assume that their friends and family won’t be supportive even if that may not be the case.
Tip: Find opportunities to voice your support for trans women and say that all women, including trans women, deserve respect. This sends a positive message that trans women are welcome in your family and your community.
For example, you might say:
"I want to let you know I will welcome and support your partners regardless of their gender or whether they are cisgender or transgender. What’s important to me is that you love each other and treat each other with respect." "I’ve seen a lot of discussion about trans women in the media and I don’t think it’s OK to debate their right to exist or be safe. All women, including trans women, should be respected."Learning more can help you be an informed ally. Read more information for family, friends, and community by clicking on the links below, or download our tip sheets
